After reading some posts on funeral work I got the idea that the way funerals are over here are alot different than 'over there'!! So this is how it works here...
Mr or Mrs xyz passes away(a bit macabre, but we usually here it 'through' the grapevine that he/she has died-small town and all!!), we wait for the phone to ring, FD (a nice lady!) calls us (if she/the family orders with us) and tells us what the family would like. At this point the deceased is either on their way or already there to the 'leichen halle' (exact translation-body hall
) which is a building right next to the cemetary with 5 cooled rooms on one side and a chapel on the other side, and the deceased(after being 'prepped' by the funeral director) is placed in the coffin, with the lid off, in one of the cooled rooms (small room, about 5x6m with 2 doors that open) so when you open the doors, you are looking at the deceased (feet in front, head at back). The funeral director has bought artificial (nice) laurels in a variety of shapes placed in the 'boxes' -thats what we call the rooms. Usually the family has ordered either a rose with a bit of ivy etc. to be placed on the blanket at the deceased's hands or sometmes they order an arrangement to be placed at the foot of the coffin on a little table or podest. That evening there is a-for lack of translation-viewing of the body for the family/close friends.
If the person has passed away say on a Sunday, usually the funeral is held on the following wednesday or Thursday, if person passed away on a Tuesday, funeral is probly on Saturday..usually 3-4 days after. So once we get the call from FD, we make up what she orders, bring it to the 'leichen halle' and place it there(yes, WE do that!) Then it goes one of two ways as far as family flowers go...either they order with the FD (who has a portfolio of our work to show them) which usually happens if the family is too distraught to come into the shop, or if they are ok, they come themselves and order what they would like, then I have to order in or pick up the flowers I need, make the designs the day before the funeral, and I deliver them myself on the morning of the funeral (most are held at 1pm or 2pm-with a few exceptions). The lid of the coffin is in a side room where I put the coffin spray on myself, and I open the doors of the 'box' where the deceased is laying and place the wreaths etc. at the foot end of the coffin. (This is where my contribution ends.) Then about a half hour before the actual funeral the family/close friends come to have a last viewing, go next door to the chapel and sit down and wait for all the other people to come. As soon as everyone is gathered the pallbearers push the coffin into the chapel, a small service is held(about 15-20 minutes) and then the pallbearers push the coffin out of the chapel to the cemetary with the pastor/father and family following, and then everyone goes to the grave where the coffin is lowered, the Pastor/Father says a few words, the coffin is lowered, the family and funeral guests drop a rose or earth onto the coffin and then everyone either walks or drives to the church(3 churches are in walking distance, the 4th isn't) and there is a service held in the church. Then after the service everyone who feels inclined goes to the church 'community centre' (??) and the church ladies serve coffee and cake...and then its over. While the funeral guests are having coffee and cake the cemetary-workers close the grave and place the flowers from the 'leichen halle' on top of the grave. Usually the family walks back to the grave when everything is over to have a moment of peace at the graveside and to look at the flowers. Unfortunatley, and I say this not to be disrespectful, but alot of folks measure the worth of how much the deceased meant to someone by the size of the tribute...thats horrid isn't it!?!
Anyway, thats really the basics of a funeral in my neck of the woods. Coming from Canada and unfortunately having attended many funerals whilst still 'home', I find the funerals here are cold and depressing. Of course, not saying that funerals are fun in Canada, but there is more of a celebration of life feeling over there. Of course people are sad when a loved one passes away...anywhere...but the difference being here is that the emphasis is put on "death" and not on the life and accomplishements of the deceased. I find that makes it worse.
Rather a morbid thread, but I'd be very interested to know how things are done elsewhere...and it is a part of our everyday lives afterall.